


the harm of love

by happyimhere



Category: Sam and Colby, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: F/M, Internal Monologue, Light Angst, Possibly Unrequited Love, Sad boi hours, Slash if you squint, if you want to read it that way - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-05-12 06:32:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19223578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/happyimhere/pseuds/happyimhere
Summary: Colby thinks about his experience with love and his best friend





	the harm of love

Colby had been there for every one of Sam’s big break ups. He’d been there after Julia, after Sam had basically ignored him for a year and a half to spend time with her. He’d come the second Sam had called, and had sat with him all night while he tried to figure out where things went wrong.  


They had broken up probably 20 times before it actually stuck. He’d listened to him argue with her from inside the car, voices rising and rising while he sunk farther in his seat. Those moments were always the worst, because Sam never wanted to go into them alone, but it always left Colby feeling like he was intruding on something way too personal. He’d wait with baited breathe to see if they would take the break or if they would end the fight with a kiss. If it was the last one, Sam would normally come back to the car and tell Colby to head on home, that he would call him later. And the cycle would start again. He’d either leave with a broken best friend or he would leave alone.  


Colby wanted to tell Sam that it wasn’t healthy, and he tried. But Sam would just tell him he didn’t understand because he had never been in love. Colby didn’t have the heart to tell him that he had learned the hard way that love wasn’t shit and that all it did was hurt. That he had learned early not to give out his love, so he kept it locked away and far from anyone else’s grasp. He learned just to play around and flirt but never get to invested.  


Instead he just watched Sam fight and fight to stay in love with someone who didn’t know what real love was. Even after Julia, and the awkward yelling and third wheeling on every argument, Colby watched as Sam fell again. And again. And maybe Sam’s way was better. He let himself get hurt, but he found something like love eventually. Colby could never put his heart on the line for someone to take. He’d have one night stands and kiss girls at bars, but he’d never get serious, because being serious led to the potential for break up. He knew he would get too serious too quick, so he fucked around with guys and girls and everyone else he could rather than fall in love.  


He watched as Sam found Kat, and watched as they didn’t split like the others before. But he watched as he was pushed to the side again, and watched as their friendship got pushed to the side so he could make room for her. And Colby couldn’t be mad because Sam deserved love more than anyone else he knew. It just sucked that for Sam to love someone, Colby had to lose him.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so this is my first fic, and I never thought I would post a real person one but here we are. This is made partially of my own experiences and partially from stories Sam and Colby have told in videos. Sorry if my tags are weird, I don’t know how to use them! I have a few more works, but I hope you enjoyed this one, I know it’s short and kind of odd!


End file.
